Bring back my mother!
Air: My Bonnie Lies Over The Ocean

I've been a good son to my mother
To me she has been a good Mum
But since she has joined that Society
Oh, listen to what she's become!

Chorus:
Bring back, bring back, oh bring back my mother to me, to me
Bring back, bring back, oh bring back my mother to me!

She used to wear beige woolly cardies
And spend her life caring for me
But now she goes prinked out in purple
In giggling great gangs to take tea

(Chorus)

She used to have one hat, in navy
But now she's got dozens in red
She's got crimson and scarlet and ruby
And my train set's been moved to the shed

(Chorus)

She used to spend hours doing housework
Her tea-towels arranged in neat rows
But now she wears fluffy red boas
And leaves feathers wherever she goes

(Chorus)

She used to like watching "Eastenders"
Sometimes for excitement, she'd knit
But now she runs sticks along railings
And I think she is learning to spit

(Chorus)

She used to be happy at Christmas
With an iron, or a nice set of pans
But now she wants sparkly tiaras
And twenty-two rings for each hand

(Chorus)

Her friends were called Brenda and Hilda
And Barbara, Betty and Joan;
But now we get Zsa Zsa and Twinkle
And Baroness Bling on the phone

(Chorus)

She used to wear sensible brassieres
Her knickers were baggy and grey
Now her bras are of lace and red satin
And I hope it's not true what they say! [gasp!]*

(Chorus)

Well, if you can't beat them, then join them
You might as well follow the crowd
But when I turned up at the teashop
They all shouted "NO BOYS ARE ALLOWED!"

Bring back, bring back, oh bring back my mother to me, to me
Bring back, bring back, oh bring back my mother to me!

HATTER SONG FROM ENGLAND .©Jenny Howard 2006
Jenny's a member of The Daft Old Bats
Cleck to see what they are up to in England!